Time Will Come...
So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom. Psalm 90:12
Since I resign from my work and became a stay-at-home mom, I have been very busy with all the things inside the house that making a new post here in my blog becomes a struggle. Oh, but how I miss reading posts from both my followers and those I am following. So here I am again=) At least my younger son now had some kind of sleeping schedule that I can fit some of my time blogging. Thank God! For the past months my schedule is compose mainly of doing all the stuff a homemaker is supposed to do. I am happy doing them. I am still adjusting maybe that my adrenaline pumps up almost all the time and I get stressed keeping up with my schedule as if I am still at the office doing the things an office worker normally do. You know betting the deadlines, before the deadlines and the likes. Then I remember I am not working for anybody anymore and that I have to relax just a little bit =)
A friend of mine asked me one time if I miss working at the office and I told her almost in an instant without even thinking: NO! =) Not that I was surprise at the question and give an impulsive answer but that was really what's in my heart at that time and until this time. I don't miss getting up early in the morning, getting ready for the office and have my breakfast at the office because I might be late if I eat at home. I don't miss all the office stuffs at all. I enjoy and love waking in the morning now. I love it when my little one makes such cute noise when he's already awake and trying to shout to the world: hey Mom, I'm awake! =) and when I turn to look at him, oh boy, the smile on his face can remove all the "sleepyheadedness" (if there's such a word, hahahah!!) in me. Such sweet smile, telling me that he is ready to begin his day. I love waking in the morning listening to my older son say "Good Morning Mommy! =)
Of course I would be lying if I say there are no days where I am not overwhelmed with the tasks and responsibilities at hand. There were such days and I cried at those days. I even feel that I am failing as a wife and as a mother when at the end of the day I did some things wrong. My older son wants to play with me and told him I just can’t because I have to tend to his little brother or that I have still have to do this and to do that. Then he will cry trying to get some of my attention. I look at him when he is sleeping and say I am sorry my son, I will do better tomorrow. And I will because there might be a time when I can no longer play with him. It might be the last time. I want to grab every chance I've got. Time flies they say and it really is. My kids are growing up so fast I may not notice that time will come when I can no longer carry them in my arms. There will come a time when they don't want me to hold their hands anymore while walking or crossing the road because they can manage to do it on their own. Time will come I won't be scrubbing their hair and feet in the bath because they want to bathe alone. Time will come I won't be singing lullabies and telling them stories at bedtime or there will be no more goodnight kisses. There will come a time when it will be the last time and time will come when there's no more time left to do it.
It seems so overwhelming doing the same things day in and day out but I ask the good Lord to give me grace to do them. I want to cherish every moment because I don't want to have regrets. Motherhood is a blessing and so is being a wife.